This isn’t even how I wanted to start my blog, but I felt that I had to address the title I gave to it. I have very mixed feelings about being elated over someone’s death, even someone who is a self-described enemy of the United States, and whom I presume would have celebrated my death if it had come at his order.
I had fallen asleep early last night and was woken at about 12:30 AM by my son Jack, who couldn’t sleep. He lay down in our bed, and my wife and I got up. I checked Facebook and saw two references to bin Laden’s death. I think I said out loud, “Oh my God,” or something to that effect. I went to my most trusted news source, the New York Times, and they had not yet put anything on their website. Then I went to CNN.com and saw confirmation there. My initial reaction was pleasure. I don’t know if I can say that I am thrilled or ecstatic or joyful or even happy that bin Laden is dead. Well, is that even true? Yes, I am. I am glad he is dead, but I am not sure how I feel or what I think about being glad.
Am I not anti-violence and anti-war in general? Did I not lecture my son over the weekend for pushing his sister? Am I reaching to connect the two? I don’t know. I do know that I was ambivalent when I saw cheering crowds outside the White House. I was less ambivalent when I watched CNN coverage of the people gathered at Ground Zero in New York cheering and singing and chanting. People talked of working and living in that neighborhood, and as I have grown up, had a family, I have gained an understanding and respect for the word “neighborhood” that I didn’t have when I (probably) first heard it on Mr. Rogers. A neighborhood was attacked nearly ten years ago. It wasn’t attacked because it was someone’s neighborhood, but I doubt much consideration was given to the World Trade Center’s neighbors. I saw a woman interviewed who was at work the morning of Sept. 11 and saw the planes hit. She was also at work when she learned the news about bin Laden, and she felt the need to celebrate. With her neighbors. That gets me on a gut level. That makes sense to me.
But chants of “U.S.A.” still trouble me. Because at heart are they a celebration of justice or revenge? Can there be justice for masterminding something as horrible as 9/11? Is the only response to kill that person? I know I sound like a freaking bleeding heart, but this is where my head and heart go.
I remember in my initial reaction to the attacks, one of my first thoughts was “We have to get who did this. We have to fight back immediately.” I also had the thought that we must rebuild the towers as quickly as possible. I guess I have a defiant streak. Now that we have killed bin Laden, I do feel a sense of satisfaction. But I think I am trying to make myself feel the weight of killing him. I don’t know if it is appropriate to celebrate his death (I think I’ve said that already).
I am aware of using the word “we” when I referred to who killed bin Laden. Something that struck me about Obama’s speech yesterday is that it called for unity. One of the things that I remember most about the days and weeks after the initial attack was the sense of unity we felt in this country. I don’t want to get political, but I do think it is relevant to reference some celebrity ( don’t remember who) that voiced his/her disappointment that Pres. Bush had an unprecedented opportunity to unify a very divided country and came up well short. I don’t necessarily blame Pres. Bush for that failure. I think there’s a lot of people in politics who view it as a game and a sport that needs to be won at all costs, and I think they wrongly used 9/11 as leverage to raise their scores.
Now, I see Pres. Obama with a similar opportunity. I hope he does not try to take all the credit and make the killing of Osama bin Laden into re-election currency. I also hope his would-be opponents don’t try to minimize what will almost certainly be positive P.R. by raising questions like, why wasn’t this accomplished sooner? I already saw a Facebook post that read something like, “I knew Obama would take credit for it. Thank you George Bush!” I don’t want politics to be a game. Shouldn’t it be about what’s best for the people. Wouldn’t the best and most truthful sentiment be that the leaders of the government – on both sides of the aisle – and individual soldiers accomplished this task? Can it not matter who gets credit?
Killing bin Laden was not winning a game. It was a necessary response. An aggressive act of self-defense. I am glad that he is dead. I’m even glad that Americans “got him.” But I’m not sure what I am going to tell my students or my children. In the end, I hope that people have their emotional responses, but also thoughtful responses.
